Taking the Kids™
Vacation Tips for Single Dads
Arthur Friedman may be a respected consultant with a Ph.D., but after his divorce, the Massachusetts dad found himself jumping on hotel-room beds with his kids.
"When it's two adults traveling with the kids, the kids go along as luggage," Friedman jokes. "When it's just me and the kids, we're a team and it's more fun."
The key to successful vacations for solo parents and their kids: Let the kids help decide where to go and what to do when you get there. Let them navigate, too.
"We feel such a sense of accomplishment when we get there," said Friedman, who counts on his middle schooler to read maps and direct him. "Every parent ought to travel alone with their children. It's a real opportunity."
Keep in mind:
- It isn't necessary to give in to something that will wreck your budget for the next six months. You can have a lot of fun camping, or staying in an inexpensive motel with an indoor pool.
- It’s OK to do nothing. What counts is the time together, not doing something every minute.
- Join forces with other parents and kids. It will take some of the pressure off you to entertain the kids 24/7—and give you some adult companionship
- Especially if you haven’t seen the kids in a while, talk to them about where they want to go and what they want to do before you plunk down any hefty deposits.
- Allow the kids to call or email their other parent as much as they like. You don’t want them to be homesick—or feel guilty about having a good time.
Seven million kids under the age of 18 are children of divorce, the U.S. Census Bureau says. Many of the kids who live with their moms will soon be heading on vacation with dad over the holidays.
Such times can strengthen parent-child relationships, dads and experts agree, but they can also make it easier to weather a crisis.
"Those important conversations don't just happen when you want them to," says one recently divorced dad. "Being relaxed together, someplace where you're having fun, helps.”
By: Eileen Ogintz
